


Après

by Plane_Lord



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, F/M, Guilt, Hurt Tony Stark, Hurt/Comfort, POV Pepper Potts, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Post-Battle of Sokovia, Protective Pepper Potts, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony-centric, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-27
Updated: 2018-10-23
Packaged: 2019-03-24 16:20:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13814916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Plane_Lord/pseuds/Plane_Lord
Summary: After Ultron, Avengers Tower is a wreck and so is Pepper Pott’s boyfriend. Pepper has gotten good at managing the aftermath of destruction, but this time seems different and she isn't sure she’ll be able to piece everything back together.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, I haven't written a fanfic of any kind, in a very long time. Here is an attempt. I am not really sure where I want to go with this, but basically, I need more Pepper & Tony between AOU and Civil War. Like what the heck happened to their relationship? I haven't seen too many fanfics, so here is my attempt to fill in the blanks. Any and all feedback is appreciated.

Pepper Potts cast a critical eye over the great room below, not at all happy with its current condition. Her position on the walkway, above the room, provided a more complete picture of the damage and what still needed to be repaired. Yellow caution tape marked the multiple windows to be replaced, as well as, the hole in the floor of Tony's lab. In Bruce's lab, several pieces of equipment were pushed to the side, damaged beyond repair and waiting to be removed. Finally, her gaze circled back to the oversized bookcase, several shelves broken and splintered. They were going to need a new one.

 

Workers had managed to clean up most of the broken glass, and debris, but there was still a lot that needed to be done before the space was livable. The interior designer was scheduled to arrive sometime Tuesday, which should speed things along. By her estimation, the Avenger’s main floor should be back to normal a week from today.

 

Pepper pulled out her phone and opened the list she had made of the estimated repairs and costs. She frowned at the growing tally and added it the grand total of the last few years. By her estimation, she was sure it now surpassed the entire collective GDP of several small nations.

 

She was getting good at this; managing the aftermath of destruction. Over the last eight years, she figured she had coordinated enough cleanup, and major renovations, to add ‘Construction Foreman’ to her resume. Pepper supposed it was better to concentrate on the mess in front of her, rather than the one currently dominating the news cycle. This mess she could handle with practiced ease.

 

Yes, this mess was easy, this mess was contained. The one out there, beyond the steel and glass confines of Avengers Tower, that was going to be anything but easy. Pepper had a sneaking suspicion that the primary catalyst of this particular mess would soon be flying through the door, a wreck in his own right, and truth be told, she wasn’t sure she was ready.

 

The news reports were still sketchy, still bereft of details. So far, all she knew for certain was that; 1.) a bunch of homicidal robots were hell bent on ending the human race, and 2.) the Avengers stopped them, but at great cost. A whole city dropped from the sky, hundreds, possibly thousands dead. She had a sneaking suspicion that her guilt-ridden, "hot mess" of a boyfriend had more to do with this disaster than anyone outside of the Avengers suspected. She wasn't stupid. She saw the images of the menacing, technologically-advanced robots, terrorizing an entire eastern European city. She was in a long-term relationship with the world’s foremost robotics expert, it wasn't a giant logical leap.

 

She had tried to call up the relevant footage in the tower. Piece together what Tony had yet to tell her, but without JARVIS's help she had only seen a brief, and grainy, snippet. It was enough to conclude, that a little more than 72 hours ago, the first of the robots had appeared as malfunctioning legionnaire droids; ground zero for Ultron was this very tower. 

 

It was alarming that JARVIS was no longer functioning, no longer running the tower or the everyday business transactions — oh and hadn't that been fun to explain to the executive board. Mostly though, she missed his calming voice. The silence was eerie after all these years of constant, and reassuring, chatter.

 

She sniffed and wiped a stray tear away, "Oh, Tony, what have you done?"

 

She thought things were better over the last two years. The fight with AIM and Killian had given Tony a new perspective, he cut down on the distractions, as promised, at least for awhile. Pepper knew she could never get him to truly stop being Iron Man, and she had never asked, she just wanted him to find a more healthy balance.They had moved to New York, nearly full time, and he finally agreed to talk to someone — work on his fears. He seemed happy, content, and present.

 

Then they had watched the fall of SHIELD. For days Tony was on the phone, holed up in his lab and office, going over the files that Natasha had released to the world. He offered his help, money, shelter, lawyers to Steve, Marie Hill, Natasha, Clint, and anyone else that suffered from the fall out. Together they put in place plans to do what world governments could not, clean up and eliminate the remains of Hydra.It had worked splendidly. Tony felt useful and, as promised, he only donned the suit when needed — though the frequency had increased exponentially over the last year.

 

Pepper wasn't naive enough to think he didn't have backup suits at the ready, or specialty suits in the works, but his obsessiveness wasn't nearly at the level it had been post-New York. Tony worked hard and spent days in the labs, but he also made sure to take her out, show up for his business obligations. Over all, Tony earnestly tried to be a good boyfriend and partner.

 

Pepper scanned the darkening skyline, the city was aglow, bathed in rose-colored tones of the setting sun. She expected to see Ironman weaving through the tall buildings, but there was still no sign of him. 

 

She scrolled through her phone and checked the time stamp on a text from Rhodey. Sent three hours and fifteen minutes ago. Pepper frowned in worry, he should be here by now. She reread the text, "Tony just left. Take care of him. This has been a tough one." Short on details, it was still more than the succinct text from Tony; which consisted of a quick, "I'm fine, don't worry. Love you." She had only gotten that, after a dozen unanswered phone calls, and multiple worry-filled texts.

 

Finally, she spotted the distinct trail of the repulsers as they streaked across the New York skyline. She watched Tony land, and take a couple stumbling steps forward, before he straightened and stepped out of the suit altogether. Even from her vantage point she could see he was exhausted, and in some physical pain.

 

Tony stood on the platform and watched as the suit was lowered into the repair facility below. With the suit safely stowed, he turned and limped inside the destroyed penthouse, favoring his left leg. He ran his right hand, wrapped in a compression bandage Pepper noted, through his hair taking in the damage around him. He gave no indication he even knew she was in room.

 

"I was starting to worry about you." Pepper said from the walkway, keeping her tone light, “Thought maybe you'd finally make good on that threat to move back to California.”

 

He startled at her voice and looked up, a small sad smile on his lips. "I took the scenic route. Sorry.”

 

Pepper watched him slowly walk to the elevator and waited, her grip tightening around the rail in anticipation. She could fix this. That's what they did, they fixed things. Together.

 

She heard the doors open and the soft squeak of his sneakers as he crossed the floor. She heard him pause, a moments hesitation, before she felt his strong arms encircle her waist. He breathed deeply, taking in her scent, as his head came to rest on her shoulder. Pepper wrapped her arms over his, “You know, I thought, the days of house destroying parties were behind us…”

 

Tony squeezed her gently, and placed a chaste kiss to her temple, “Well, you know me, it’s not a real party unless I blow out a couple windows and need a major remodel by the end of the night.”

 

Pepper turned to get a better look at him. She ran a gentle finger over the scratch on his left cheek. He had certainly looked more beat up than this, but his red rimmed eyes, and the slight tremble of his body suggested a far deeper hurt. “Tony, are you—“ she wanted to ask him to tell her everything, but she knew better than to push him —he would talk when he was ready, not before. “Did you eat? I had Happy pick up some Ray’s.” Pizza, Pepper had learned long ago, always made Tony feel better.

 

Tony leaned forward, his forehead pressed to hers. A half smile on his lips, as he spoke softly, “You take such good care of me. I don’t deserve it.”

 

“I think we’ve had this discussion before…” Pepper sighed, her right hand gently scratching the nape of his neck. “I seem to recall that I vehemently disagree with half your assessment.”

 

She could feel a little tension leave his body, as she continued to run her fingers through his hair. He didn’t move from his position, ignoring her earlier question.

 

“Bruce is gone.”

 

Pepper’s hands stilled, waiting for him to continue.

 

"He took a Quinn Jet, no idea where. Guess it was all too much for him.”

 

“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry.”

 

“I really fucked up, Pepper. Everything. JARVIS is gone. Bruce is gone. And there’s a crater where a whole goddamn city is supposed to be.” His voice cracked, his eyes glassy with the threat of tears, “My fault. My fault, again.”

 

Pepper cupped his face in her hands, forcing him to look at her, “Hey, you’re a good person, Tony. This is— ” she couldn’t believe any of it was true. He blamed himself for things out of his control, too often, to take his word for it now. “—this is your exhaustion talking. Whatever happened, whatever the details, we’ll get through this. You and me. It _will_ look better tomorrow.”

 

She gently kissed his cheek and ran her hands down his arms, taking his hands in hers. “I think that we need to get some food in you, clean up, and get to bed. We’ll figure this out, Tony.”

 

Tony took a shuddering breath and nodded, “Right. Food. Shower. Sleep. The Pepper Pott’s fix for all of life’s problems.”

 

Pepper smiled gently and led him to the elevator. She knew that tomorrow didn’t always prove to be better, but she was determined to do whatever she could to help make it so.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What can I say? I'm a very slow writer. So here is a short little update. I'm working on more, I promise!
> 
> \---  
> Update to the update: So, I am never satisfied and have done a little rewrite. Mostly the same, but a few things added, changed. Working on the next chapter and hope to have it up soon!

The next morning was, decidedly not better, but Pepper wasn't about to let Tony know to what extent. Once she had managed to get him into bed, he slept like the dead — barely moving for twelve hours. When he did finally wake she handed him two prescription strength Aspirin and a green breakfast smoothie. He was so sore he laid back down, with a groan, and promptly fell back asleep for another four and half hours.

 

Pepper was well into hour three of a conference call, with her crisis management team, by the time Tony emerged from their bedroom. Freshly showered, dressed in joggers, a navy t-shirt, and a gray cashmere hoodie, Pepper recognized as lab attire; he made a beeline for the coffee pot. He poured himself a cup and slowly limped over to where she sat on the overlarge, brown leather sofa.He paused behind her, no doubt to look at the documents she had open, and then gave her shoulder a soft squeeze and a quick kiss to her temple.

 

“All right, I think this a good place to take a break.” Pepper said, interrupting a long spiel about the Stark Relief Foundation’s efforts to provide support in Sokovia. “Let’s reconvene in three hours, so 2pm eastern. I have some documents to review and we could all use a break. That should also give time for Claire to prepare us a more detailed cost estimate for Phase One: Sokovia; and an update on Johannesburg. Thank you, everyone.”

 

Pepper disconnected her tablet and turned her attention to her boyfriend. She reached for his hand, which still lingered on her shoulder, “Well, good morning, handsome.”

 

“Morning,” Tony grunted in reply, still not quite awake. He removed his hand and limped around to her side of the sofa. She watched as he lowered himself, slowly, a grimace on his face, to sit next to her. Once down, he took a sip of his coffee and observed the organized chaos of Pepper’s work area.

 

He gestured to her pile of papers and notes, “Looks like you’ve been busy.”

 

“Yes, well, there’s been a lot to go over this morning. But I am pleased to report that we should be ready to mobilize initial relief efforts by the end of the day, tomorrow.”

 

“How are you feeling? Need me to send for the doctor?” She asked.

 

Despite the nearly fourteen hours of sleep he still looked terrible. His face was drawn, pale, even in the midmorning light. She had just spent three hours listening to reports of the horrific damage in Sokovia, she knew it was bad and she worried about what it meant for him. Tony had a nasty habit of blaming himself for things out of his control and this was likely to prove no exception. He had been so happy the last few months and she dreaded the possible setbacks this might cause.

 

“I’ve been better — sore and feeling my age. No doctor, just need to warm up a little.”

He took a deep breath and ran his hands over his face, trying to pull himself together. “I have some work to do. Need to get Friday up and running for the tower. Going to take most of the day, maybe two, before she’s ready for SI operations.”

 

“Well, it’s made things interesting but we’ve managed so far, a couple days won’t make much difference.” Pepper reached for his bandaged right hand, giving it a gentle squeeze, “I’m sorry about JARVIS, Tony.”

 

His sorrowful eyes didn’t meet her’s when he replied softly, “Yeah, me too.”

 

Pepper didn’t know what else to say, but she kept her hand on his, hoping it conveyed some sense of comfort. She was having a hard time coping with the loss of JARVIS, so she couldn’t imagine how heartbroken Tony must feel. JARVIS had been a constant, reassuring, not to mention helpful, presence for nearly a decade. The last three days of silence had not been easy, leaving the tower feeling even more empty and abandoned. She knew Tony was mourning the loss as if he were a living, breathing human being.

 

The melancholy silence was broken by an alert from Pepper’s tablet, she grimaced when she saw who it was from. “I’m sorry, Tony, I have to take this. We’ll talk later, okay?” She hated it, but the post-near world ending catastrophe required her immediate attention.

 

Tony sniffed and offered her a forced smile, “Right. Save the world, Pepper Potts. I’ll be in my office.” With that, he pushed himself to stand and limped out of the living room to the elevators and the floors below their penthouse.

 

* * *

 

It was nearly 8pm when Pepper decided to end her work day, her assistants sent home hours ago. Her eyes burned, dry with exhaustion. A tension headache had firmly taken hold, the two Aspirin she had swallowed had done nothing to alleviate the pressure.

 

She leaned back in her plush office chair and closed her eyes, taking a deep, calming breath. It had been a grueling, yet productive day. However, the busy day, and lack of super helpful AI, had left her little time to look in on Tony and that worried her. He had not been in a good place this morning, and from what she had learned about the events of the last few days, there wasn’t going to be anything to turn his mood around soon. 

 

Tony had sent a company-wide email, around noon, briefly explaining the absence of JARVIS, and a time table of when he expected a replacement A.I. (called FRIDAY), to be operational. Another email was sent at 1:30pm to the tower workers, and occupants, explaining that FRIDAY was essentially operational but would be in “learning and diagnostic mode” for the next 24 hours. Pepper picked up her phone and thumbed through her notifications — nothing from him since a thumbs up emoji, sent in reply to her 3pm, “Still in the office?” text. 

 

A phone call, with Maria Hill, had given her a better idea of what transpired in the days before the battle in Sokovia. Alien technology — Loki’s spear, she had said — were used, by Hydra, on a brother and sister. The sister could manipulate minds, move objects, with her mind. Her brother (deceased) could move faster than the eye could see. It was confusing, and unbelievable, but Pepper had seen a lot of fantastical things over the last decade, so she didn’t doubt a single word.

 

_“No one knows exactly what she showed Tony, but it made him make some… rash decisions, and that combined with Loki’s scepter… We’re doing our best to keep this all under wraps, Pepper, but" Maria paused, “we have to be very careful about how this is handled. This isn’t all Tony’s fault, it was…alien, but there will be those that will try to blame him if anyone finds out that the program, Ultron, was created by Tony Stark. It won’t matter why he did it, or how he was manipulated, just that he did.”_

 

Knowing more about the situation didn’t do anything to ease Pepper’s worries.Everything about Sokovia was a looming public relations disaster for Tony and the Avengers. They had saved the world, but destroyed a city. Maria was right, they had to handle this entire situation with precision, there was zero room for error.

 

Error could sink Stark Industries; she had to protect S.I. from any litigious actions. She had to protect Tony’s personal assets, not only from lawsuits, but himself. There was no doubt he would give away every penny if it would assuage a fraction of guilt — especially, when his guilty conscience had a very visible and real reminder, in the form of a city-sized hole in the ground.

 

Pepper had to protect Tony, and by extension SI, from the US government, and all of this would make the job that much harder. There had always been an underlying fear of Tony and his creations by a few in the government — both politicians and some in the military. People had been trying to assert control over Tony and his technology, his whole life. After Iron Man, Tony had had to fight even harder to keep his independence. If they weren’t very careful, ULTRON could be the excuse they finally needed to take the suits and put him under their control.

 

Pepper thumbed through the calendar on her phone. It had been free of appointments for the next two weeks, now it was filled, barely a day off. She allowed herself to feel a moment of self-pity, and yes, she knew it was selfish, but dammit she had so been looking forward to a well-deserved holiday.

 

Today, she was _supposed_ to be on a private jet bound for Majorca, Spain. She opened the email from her assistant, on her computer, and clicked longingly through the pictures. It was a beautiful Spanish villa, in Port d’Andratx, offering a stunning 360 degree view of the harbor, the sea, and Sa Dragonera — the rugged desert island and national park. Secluded and private, it was still close enough to town to enjoy some local culture, if they so desired.

 

The very private, and grand villa, overlooking the Balearic Sea with an infinity pool and private beach, was reserved for twelve glorious days. It was supposed to be a relaxing, and romantic, holiday spent eating olives, fresh seafood, paella, and drinking Spanish wine, with her handsome boyfriend. The Majorcan trip was going to be their first real vacation together in over a year.

 

Instead, for the next week, possibly months, her life would be filled with post-Sokovia crisis-management; taking her away from the business, projects, and home life she loved. All this heartache, and stress, because Pepper Pott’s fell in love with a compulsive, paranoid genius/super hero, obsessed with protecting the entire planet from an alien invasion that may never happen. It made her want to punch the living daylights out of him, but she also felt so much sorrow she wanted to cry right there, at her desk.

 

Tony had worked so hard to ease his anxieties. She feared, no, she _knew_ that whatever had brought about Ultron, whatever that strange woman had shown him, this would be a major setback for his mental health. Maybe it would break him, and truth be told, Pepper wasn’t sure she had the strength to piece Tony Stark back together again. 

 

Her heart heavy, and feeling physically drained, Pepper decided it was time to drag her troubled genius from the lab he had sequestered himself to. She didn’t think it was possible to be any more stressed, but as the elevator rose, she began to feel nauseous with anxiety.

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short update, is short.

Tony’s office was dark, except for the multitude of flat screens, broadcasting news from around the world. She almost didn’t see him in the Eames lounger, centered in front of the screens. Once her eyes adjusted, she could see he sat hunched over, head in his hands looking more dejected and beaten than he had this morning.

 

The news networks coverage of Sokovia was heartbreaking. Over and over they showed the horrific footage of the city exploding and then dropping from the sky, reduced to rubble and ashes. They showed mothers clutching their crying children and looking for their husbands, parents desperately seeking news of their missing children, children crying for their lost parents and siblings. Bodies were being pulled from the ruble of the ruined city, and even some from the small outlying villages caught in the fallout. The devastation left from the battle looked like it was lifted straight out of some apocalyptic Hollywood summer blockbuster.

 

Pepper watched the coverage from the doorway, feeling overwhelmed and uncertain about what she should do. She wasn’t even sure Tony was awake, he hadn’t moved a muscle since she had arrived. She scanned the room, looking for anything that might give her another clue into his state of mind. The chicken and quinoa salad she had delivered for lunch sat on the desk, still wrapped and untouched, not good. When she spotted the nearly empty bottle of Macallan scotch on the small end table next to the chair, her stomach dropped. Definitely not good.

 

She sent a quick text to Happy. Judging by state of the bottle, and the fact Tony had yet to notice her, Pepper was going to need help getting him to the penthouse. This was not how she wanted to end her night and, for a brief moment, she consideredturning around, leaving Tony to wallow in his sorrow.

 

Her phone buzzed with a reply from Happy, he was on his way. There was little point in delaying this confrontation, so she took a deep breath, and a determined step forward, into the office. It was time to drag Tony out of his self-imposed isolation.

 

“Tony,” she placed her hand on his shoulder, “You need to come upstairs.”

 

His head lifted to look up at her, even in the flickering light cast by the screens, she could see his eyes were glossy and bloodshot. He reached up and grasped her hand in his, his voice was raw with emotion when he spoke, “I don’t know if I can fix this, Pepper. I really fucked up.”

 

“Tony, this isn’t helping. We’ve talked about this before… this isn’t all your fault and you can’t undo what’s already happened.”

 

“I just want to protect people. I thought —” he paused, searching for the right words. “I thought it would be like JARVIS, something to watch over the world, protect us.This,” he gestured toward the TV screens, “This wasn’t supposed to happen, and now... I don’t know what to do...”

 

“Tony...” Pepper felt tears involuntarily well up, she wanted to tell him it was fine and everything would be okay, but it wasn’t fine and maybe things would never be okay. “You need to come upstairs. Sitting down here, drinking... this isn’t helping. This,” pointing to the bottle, “It doesn’t fix anything.”

 

He nodded solemnly and gave her hand another squeeze. “I know.” He said, his voice barely above a whisper, the words slightly slurred, “I’m sorry. I just I had to know what they were saying and how bad… I couldn’t…” He paused, glancing at the nearly empty bottle of scotch, “I’m sorry, I needed something to take the edge off.”

 

“Tony —“ she pauses and pushes down the anger she feels building. It wouldn’t do any good to get angry, not tonight. “We’ll talk about this tomorrow. Right now, you’re going to turn all of this off and come upstairs.”

 

For a moment she thinks he might challenge her, but when he turns a bleary eyed look her way, she sees there’s no fight left. He nods in acceptance and falls back into he chair, “Friday, you heard the lady, screens off.”

 

The screens go dark immediately, the overhead lights turned to dim so they’re not totally in the dark. Pepper is relieved to hear the sound of the elevator door opening with the arrival of Happy. For once, he’s dressed casually in jeans and a T-shirt. Not for the first time, she finds herself thankful that she and Tony have such a loyal employee and friend. She motions for him to enter the office and turns her attention back to Tony, “Can you stand?”

 

He doesn’t reply, but starts to push himself up from the chair. He gets about halfway when his arms buckle and he falls back into the chair. Happy rushes up and grabs him by the right elbow, “I gotcha, boss. Come on, up we go.”

 

“Heeey Hap…” Tony slurs. Happy helps him stand, looping an arm around Tony’s waist. With Tony’s arm draped over his shoulders they both shuffle clumsily to the elevators.Pepper follows, close behind, neither of the men see the tears she wipes away before she steps on to the elevator.


End file.
